Crossroad

When you're in the crossroad
You paused for a while
You contemplate on your choices
You gasped, your stunned
You may never believe it will come to this
But still, you're in the crossroad
The road that lay ahead diverse into two
You hope that your mind can be easily made up
You're wrong
It's hard to make decisions on the crossroad
Though the choice might be obvious
Still, you can't seemed to execute it
Your mind can't justify the path you may took
Everything makes no sense
You lost touch with reality
You no longer able to differentiate between emotion and logic
It became very personal
Your brain and your heart entered the battlefield
Both of it wants to emerge as the winner
It makes you realise that you can no longer trust any of it
Your screaming inside
You have mixed feelings
You want to fight
But you don't know the possible outcome
The thin, fine line between logic and emotion
It's fucking with you
The sharp pain emerged
The tingling sensation of defeat
You drop on your knees
Your body losses its ability to withstand your weight
Gravity wins
Both the roads look gray
You have mixed feelings
The ticking bomb
The screaming soul
The crying heart
The enthusiastic brain
The sudden rush of adrenaline
Your body pumps battery acid
Your heart races
You're still thinking
Which road is better
Which road is less agonizing
You cursed the crossroad
Why can't the choices be easier
You're empty
You're hurt
You're confused
It doesn't make any sense
You're still standing there
Frozen stiff in front of the crossroad
You started to lose hope
There's no light in the end of the tunnel

How can I let go my joie de vivre, if that is what keeps me happy all this while
How can I accept reality
How can I face my deepest fear and fight the monster

If you don't know what you want, you will end up with a lot you don't
It's only after you lose everything, you are free to do anything

I'm going to take the first step of my next move
I'm going to continue my quest
God help me
I'm gathering whatever strength I have left
And embarked on my journey

Revelation
I need that