The world is full of idiots.
Ultra-narcissistic idiots.
Hurrah for mankind.
And God saves us all.
We are but one, bathing in the vast amount of comfortableness and norm, assuaged with the yardstick that society set so low.
Yet we gathered the scorned, the hateful, and the norm, basking with misleading praises and sweet words, forming a wall we called civilised.
For as far as we can roam, the ground shakes with tremor and the sky roars with thunder.
The ship at the sea sails on stagnant water and stale weather.
No stars to guide, no winds to assist.
Equipped only with the promise of utopia beneath the heaven's horizon.
Yet we continue to embark, continue to move forward with whatever speed we can muster on an aging setup.
We love, but we hate.
The hatred, although carefully kept in clusters and bounded with honest conceptions, still became cancerous and parasitical.
A virus that is ravaging the internal system, shaking the core, gnawing on the foundation.
But forever the horizon is promised.
Forever the ship will embark.
For the stars will glaze and say "Oh thee are the fortunate that are striving not sulking, embracing not cowing, thrusting not stopping".
For as far as the eye can see, the heart is as strong as steel, as pure as silk, as precious as gold.
For as long as man can live, then forever he shall see.
Get it?
I digress. Okay, then. I thought about fatherhood because the topic of being one surfaced recently. Not the best of topic; kind of like the Pandora's Box. Was kind of sad at the moment, but now I am just going to see the good side of it.
I digress again. So here it is. The followings are my list of my top 3 favourite songs and movies relating to fatherhood (not necessarily in the order)
Top 3 Father's song:
Gun N Roses - Sweet Child O' Mine
Do I need to say more? For those who never listen to this song, please slap yourself three times in the face. This song defines the 80's. And what's more, this song is a dedication from a father to his daughter. Sweet lyrics too. And again, Slash is brilliant on the solo.
Reminds me of childhood memories
Where everything
Was as fresh as the bright blue sky
Now and then when I see her face
She takes me away to that special place
And if I'd stare too long
I'd probably break down and cry
Sweet child o' mine
Sweet love of mine
She's got eyes of the bluest skies
As if they thought of rain
I hate to look into those eyes
And see an ounce of pain
Her hair reminds me of a warm safe place
Where as a child I'd hide
And pray for the thunder
And the rain
To quietly pass me by
Sweet child o' mine
Sweet love of mine
Where do we go
Where do we go now
Where do we go
Sweet child o' mine
Will Smith - Just The Two Of Us
The original melody was, I believed, from a band called Groover Washington Jr. They might be another original artist, but I am kind of lazy to search it up. Just listen to the music and feel the lyrics. It was as if Will Smith is really trying to convey a message to his son, being the most honest and truthful about it. Great song, great lyric, great singer.
I knew I'd meet death before I'd let you meet harm
Although questions arose in my mind, would I be man enough?
Against wrong, choose right and be standin up
From the hospital that first night
Took a hour just ta get the carseat in right
People drivin all fast, got me kinda upset
Got you home safe, placed you in your basonette
That night I don't think one wink I slept
As I slipped out my bed, to your crib I crept
Touched your head gently, felt my heart melt
Cause I know I loved you more than life itself
Then to my knees, and I begged the Lord please
Let me be a good daddy, all he needs
Love, knowledge, discipline too
I pledge my life to you
Chorus:
Just the two of us, we can make it if we try
Just the two of us, (Just the two of us)
Just the two of us, building castles in the sky
Just the two of us, you and I
Five years old, bringin comedy
Everytime I look at you I think man, a little me
Just like me
Wait an see gonna be tall
Makes me laugh cause you got your dads ears an all
Sometimes I wonder, what you gonna be
A General, a Doctor, maybe a MC
Haha, I wanna kiss you all the time
But I will test that butt when you cut outta line, trudat
Uh-uh-uh why you do dat?
I try to be a tough dad, but you be makin me laugh
Crazy joy, when I see the eyes of my baby boy
I pledge to you, I will always do
Everything I can
Show you how to be a man
Dignity, integrity, honor an
An I don't mind if you lose, long as you came with it
An you can cry, ain't no shame it it
It didn't work out with me an your mom
But yo, push come to shove
You was conceived in love
So if the world attacks, and you slide off track
Remember one fact, I got your back
Chorus
It's a full-time job to be a good dad
You got so much more stuff than I had
I gotta study just to keep with the changin times
101 Dalmations on your CD-ROM
See me-I'm
Tryin to pretend I know
On my PC where that CD go
But yo, ain't nuthin promised, one day I'll be gone
Feel the strife, but trust life does go wrong
But just in case
It's my place
To impart
One day some girl's gonna break your heart
And ooh ain't no pain like from the opposite sex
Gonna hurt bad, but don't take it out on the next, son
Throughout life people will make you mad
Disrespect you and treat you bad
Let God deal with the things they do
Cause hate in your heart will consume you too
Always tell the truth, say your prayers
Hold doors, pull out chairs, easy on the swears
You're living proof that dreams do come true
I love you and I'm here for you
Ugly Kid Joe - Cats In The Cradle
What I really like about this song is the melody. Especially the transition from the verse and the chorus. It kind of like swaying you gently on the verse before delivering the punch during the chorus. The original version came from Harry Chapin, but I prefer the Ugly Kid Joe's version. The lyrics, on the other hand, are not as jovial and motivating as the previous two songs. This one has a more melancholic and sad twist on it.
Came to the world in the usually way
But there were planes to catch and bills to pay.
He learned to walk while I was away.
He was talkin' 'fore I knew it.
And as he grew he said,
"I'm gonna be like you, Dad.
You know I'm gonna be like you."
Chorus :
And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man on the moon.
"When you comin' home ?"
"Son, I don't know when.
We'll get together then.
You know we'll have a good time then."
Well, my son turned ten just the other day.
He said , "Thanks for the ball, Dad. Come on, let's play.
Could you teach me to throw ?" I said, "Not today.
I got a lot to do." He said, "That's okay."
And he walked away and he smiled and he said,
"You know,
I'm gonna be like him, yeah.
You know I'm gonna be like him."
Chorus
Well, he came from college just the other day,
So much like a man I just had to say,
"I'm proud of you. Could you sit for a while ?"
He shook his head and he said with a smile,
"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys.
See you later. Can I have them please ?"
Chorus :
And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon,
Little boy blue and the man on the moon.
"When you comin home, Son ?"
"I don't know when.
We'll get together then.
You know we'll have a good time then."
I've long since retired, my son's moved away.
I called him up just the other day.
"I'd like to see you, if you dont mind."
He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I could find the time.
You see my new job's a hassle and the kids have the flu,
But it's sure nice talkin' to you, Dad.
It's been sure nice talkin' to you."
And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me,
He'd grown up just like me.
My boy was just like me.
(Yeah, yeah, yeah)
Top 3 Father's movie:
A Perfect World (1993)
I personally believe that this is a must-watch movie for every single dad or soon-to-be dad in the world today. The storyline is really beautiful. The way Kevin Costner portrayed the model fatherly figure and conveys his love for the kid is really touching. It has a sad ending too. I don't believe men will weep. But it does pushes a certain button in their heart.
The Pursuit Of Happyness (2006)
Again, another touching movie that revolved around fatherhood. Will Smith's acting was brilliant. This movie has one of the most touching scene in movie history (or at least to my liking), during the scene where Will Smith and his son was forced to sleep in the bathroom of the subway station and the janitor was trying to get it. But then, it also has one of the most relieving and most triumphant moment in an actor's character, during the scene when Will Smith gets the job, get out from the office, and celebrate outside the building. You can really felt how he feels at that time. Brilliant.
I Am Sam (2001)
To be perfectly honest, I have only seen this movie once; during an English class in high school about 8 years ago. However, I can really remembered this movie well, as it has imprinted its message inside myself. The struggle of custody battle between parents, and the portrayal of a mentally retarded father trying to win such battle is stunning. You can really justify those battle here in this movie. A touching movie too (why oh why do I have to choose touching movies when it comes to fatherhood? Damn)
So there goes my Top 3 lists for both criteria. I know there are many other choices when it comes to fatherhood, but these are the movies and songs that left an imprint on me, and has successfully conveyed the messages across. Enjoy!
# This is one of my favourite poem of all time, and coincidentally it has, within its writing, a message from a father to his son.
| If you can keep your head when all about you If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; If you can make one heap of all your winnings If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue, |
So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skys from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade
Your heros for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange
A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here.

Manchester United won the 4th Round English Carling Cup ties with Wolverhampton after goals by Bebe (56'), Park Ji Sung (70'), and Javier Hernandez (90'). Chicharito has done it again, saving United from the possibilities of humiliating defeat at home. A nice goal too. Perhaps this little fellow can be a serious contender for the striking options, leaving Rooney lots to think about. Kudos to Bebe on his first starting line up. Seems to be promising. A lot of work still need to be done in the back four. We'll see.
Paul the Octopus dies

The oracle has died. After maintaining a 100% correct prediction in the 2010 World Cup, the octopus is dead. RIP Paul. We'll miss you.
Shortlist for FIFA Ballon d' Or 2010

Xabi Alonso (Spain)
Daniel Alves (Brazil)
Iker Casillas (Spain)
Cristiano Ronaldo (Portugal)
Didier Drogba (Cote d'Ovoire)
Samuel Eto'o (Cameroon)
Cesc Fabregas (Spain)
Diego Forlan (Uruguay)
Asamoah Gyan (Ghana)
Andres Iniesta (Spain)
Julio Cesar (Brazil)
Miroslav Klose (Germany)
Philipp Lahm (Germany)
Maicon (Brazil)
Lionel Messi (Argentina)
Thomas Muller (Germany)
Mesut Ozil (Germany)
Carles Puyol (Spain)
Arjen Robben (Netherlands)
Bastian Schweinsteiger (Germany)
Wesley Sneijder (Netherlands)
David Villa (Spain)
Xavi (Spain)
But there is an example which I would like to amplify today: Hauntingly beautiful.
A 'Hauntingly Beautiful' music is a description (which I uses) to describe musics which, literally, can gives you goosebumps. It is a music or a song which can lift the hair on the back on your neck when you listen to it with your eyes closed. You can almost imagine the notes dancing in the air, whispering soft yet strong message into your head. Or an eerie feeling, but somehow beautiful up to a point that you feel every notes and every words belong. In other words, it's indescribable. Haha. I digress.
So here is my Top 3 list of songs which I personally find hauntingly beautiful:
1) The Mantovanni Orchestra - Speak, Softly Love (Theme for 'The Godfather')
What else can I say. I am 100% obsessed with the trilogy, so it is inevitable that I like the song too. But this is, in my humble opinion, the most hauntingly beautiful song. Just close your eyes and listen to melody. I mean, truly listen to the way the melody waives and flows. The lyrics of this song, sang by Andy Williams or Al Martino, are beautiful too:
We're in a world, our very own
Sharing a love that only few have ever known
Wine colored days warmed by the sun
Deep velvet nights when we are one
Speak softly, love so no one hears us but the sky
The vows of love we make will live until we die
My life is yours and all because
You came into my world with love so softly love
Wine colored days warmed by the sun
Deep velvet nights when we are one
Speak softly, love so no one hears us but the sky
The vows of love we make will live until we die
My life is yours and all because
You came into my world with love so softly love
2) Guns N Roses - November Rain
The guitar riffs from Slash, the piano melody from Axl Rose, the accompanying orchestra in the back; that alone is enough to make me labeled this song as hauntingly beautiful. You can almost sway along with the progression of the melody, giving you goosebumps along the way. At times, I nearly drooled while listening to the song. True story. But I have to say, the punch line or the deadly blow which effectively raised this song above any other started when Slash climbed that piano.
The lyrics? Well written:
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain
We've been through this
Such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain
yeahh..
But lovers always come
And lovers always go
And no one's really sure
Who's lettin' go today
Walking away
If we could take the time
To lay it on the line
I could rest my head
Just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me
Then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin'
In the cold November rain
Do you need some time
On your own
Do you need some time
All alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time
All alone
I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you
Sometimes I need some time
On my own
Sometimes I need some time
All alone
Everybody needs some time
On their own
Don't you know you need some time
All alone
And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness
We still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever
Even cold November rain
Don't ya think that you
Need somebody
Don't ya think that you
Need someone
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one
3) The Smiths - There is a light that never goes out.
The melody of this song is simple. So simple, that it turns out to be one of the best I've ever heard. The idea is kept simplified and straight to the point. Unlike some songs nowadays where they tried stuffing many ideas into a song, making it rubbish and losses its essence. Simplicity is better, hands down. The melody is moving to me, but what makes this song hauntingly beautiful is the lyrics. Read it, have a sing-along, you'll see what I mean:
Where there's music and there's people
Who are young and alive
Driving in your car
I never never want to go home
Because I haven't got one anymore
Take me out tonight
Because I want to see people
And I want to see life
Driving in your car
Oh please don't drop me home
Because it's not my home, it's their home
And I'm welcome no more
And if a double-decker bus
Crashes into us
To die by your side
Is such a heavenly way to die
And if a ten ton truck
Kills the both of us
To die by your side
Well the pleasure, the privilege is mine
Take me out tonight
Take me anywhere, I don't care
I don't care, I don't care
And in the darkened underpass
I thought Oh God, my chance has come at last
But then a strange fear gripped me
And I just couldn't ask
Take me out tonight
Oh take me anywhere, I don't care
I don't care, I don't care
Driving in your car
I never never want to go home
Because I haven't got one
No, I haven't got one
And if a double-decker bus
Crashes in to us
To die by your side
Is such a heavenly way to die
And if a ten ton truck
Kills the both of us
To die by your side
Well the pleasure, the privilege is mine
There is a light that never goes out
There is a light that never goes out
There is a light that never goes out
There is a light that never goes out
Though humans often think of vestigial organs as useless little fixtures that sometimes, as in the case of the appendix, cause us extreme anguish, we wouldn’t know nearly as much about macroevolution as we do now without their presence. In On the Origin of Species, Charles Darwin used vestigial organs as evidence for evolution, and their presence has helped define and shape our phylogenetic trees.
Why the Leftovers?
Contrary to what most think, vestigial doesn’t necessarily mean useless; in some cases, we may just not yet know exactly how the organ is used in its current incarnation. (The human thymus was once thought to be vestigial). Because these structures can be traced back through the ancestors, they essentially serve as a marker of evolution; no organism can have a vestigial organ that hasn’t been found in its forefathers. For this reason, you won’t ever find feathers on a mammal or gills on a primate.
Similar in concept to vestigial structures are atavisms, which are the reappearance of a structure or trait that isn’t found in the immediate ancestors. For instance, whales and dolphins have been found in nature with hind limbs; this rare occurrence is due to the reemergence of a trait they inherited from their terrestrial ancestors.
Humans also contain structures that mark where we came from and perhaps, which structures’ evolution will take care of over time.
Human Tail (Bone) One striking example of an atavism is the human coccyx, or tailbone, which is a relic of the mammalian tail. Useful for mammals that use tails for balance, species-to-species signaling, and support, the tail is missing in apes and in humans. However, all human embryos initially have a tail. Normally, they regress into four to five fused vertebrae (the coccyx). However, there have been numerous case studies of human children being born with an extended coccyx—a tail—that was removed without incident. Ranging from one inch to five, the gene that normally stops vertebrae elongation is decreased and the human tail remains at birth.
Wisdom Teeth Our ancestors, known to be herbivores, needed strong molars for mashing up and chewing plant material. This relic is why many of us will develop wisdom teeth, also known as third molars. Theoretically, they could still be used for chewing, but in one third of people, they can come in sideways, impacted, or can cause pain and infection. This is why these vestigial structures are almost always removed when they begin to come in.
Appendix Another leftover from our plant eating ancestors is the vermiform appendix, which is an organ attached to the large intestine. A similar sac is much bigger in other animals than it is in humans and is used to aid in digesting high cellulose diets.
While appendicitis can be a potentially fatal condition, and removing the appendix has no adverse effects, some researchers think that the appendix might have an auxiliary function, such as aiding the immune system.
Vitamin C Synthesis In humans, vitamin C deficiency causes scurvy, and can eventually cause death. We can’t synthesize vitamin C (ascorbic acid), but our ancestors, save for the guinea pig and primates, were able to do so. Therefore, it makes sense that we have a vestigial molecular structure, now defunct, that manufactures the vitamin. The gene required for vitamin C synthesis was found in humans in 1994, but it was a pseudogene, meaning it was present but unable to function. The pseudogene was also found in some primates and guinea pigs, as expected.
Male Nipples Male nipples are sometimes referred to as vestigial, although they aren’t truly, because they were never functional in our ancestors. Instead, they most likely occur because in the embryonic stage we are essentially sexless, only differentiating into male and female with the presence of hormones.
Goose Bumps When we get goose bumps, it’s the action of muscle fibers called erector pili, which cause the hairs in follicles to stand to attention. In animals, such as a cat, this causes a larger appearance and can be used to thwart an attacker, as well as trap air between feathers and fur for insulation. However, humans, with our minimal coating of fur, don’t really need the raised hair; we use jackets instead. It is therefore thought that goose bumps don’t really serve much of a purpose. However, the small expenditure of energy used to contract the muscles could, perhaps, cause a tiny release of heat. Or, because goose bumps are associated not only with cold, but emotional responses as well (listening to a good song, seeing a scary movie) they could now serve as a form of communication with others.
Vomeronasal Organs (VNOs) In mice and other animals, the tiny vomeronasal organs (VNOs) are thought to be responsible for pheromone detection, helping to pick up the chemicals that signal a potential mate, reproductive status, and other social cues. Although similar structures have been found in humans, they’re largely thought to be vestigial and inactive, having lost nerve connection to the brain.
There are other vestigial and atavistic structures in humans, especially when you consider the potential leftovers in our genomes. And if they don’t require too much energy or resources to make, chances are they’ll stick with us for the long haul.
(taken from DivineCaroline)
I remembered the first time I wanted to own a pair of football boots, after seeing my friends using them while football and hockey practice. I remembered looking at the field and observing the imprints of the studs of the boots being marked clearly on the field. At that moment, I tell myself that one of these days, my boots will leave the same markings on this field. My first boots was really a humble one. My father bought me a Fung Keong boots. I don't know if you have heard this brand, but it existed. Don't know if they are still around. Imagine a black Pallas Jazz shoe with rubber studs below; that is Fung Keong. It wasn't pretty, but I am really proud of that boots. I remembered kicking a ball for the first time using that boots. The feeling was amazing. As a kid, I felt like for the first time, I achieved something. Good times.
During my early teens, my tendencies of owning a particular thing have shifted along a new set of things. Toys are no longer in my mind. I started to obsessed about things that have anything to do with music. I began obsessing about guitars. I started going to gigs and imagining myself to be on the stage, rocking the hell out of my strings. I never got to buy a guitar at that time, as my farther was strongly opposing it. In fact, I only got my first guitar about 10 years later, during my tertiary studies, as a gift from my brother; an acoustic Santa Cruz. The feeling was mutual. I went into the guitar shop, and there she was. Ready to be plucked. Ready to be held in my arms. It was like love at first sight. I remembered plucking it for the first time. The tunes stuck on me for a very long time. She's still here now. Beautiful and amazing as always.
I remembered the first thing I bought with my very first paycheck, working as a Customer Service Assistant in Caltex Section 3, Shah Alam. I always wanted to buy a watch. As I am quite an outdoor person, a strong and reliable watch comes to mind. Then I saw it; a G-Shock watch. That is the very first thing I bought with my very first paycheck. And it's a damn good watch as well. I rarely get it off my wrist. In fact, I only took it off while bathing. It followed me while I camping, swimming, playing sports, jogging, even sleeping. I even wore it when I climbed my first mountain in Cameroon Highlands. I still own it, although the strap is broken. I am going to fix it.
Until now, the feeling of craving and obsessions are still a big part of my life. I know, we are all trained to be consumers, working jobs we hate so that we can buy something we don't need. I know that. But shit, the feelings of owning something you truly desire are overwhelming, satisfying your obsession, lighting up your day, making life worth living. Okay, I'm exaggerating. You get the idea.
Why am I writing this? Two reasons; Firstly, this is the entry that came across my mind today, about the whole consumerism and male obsession thing. Secondly, I just bought something that is truly something I desire and obsess about for many a years. Something I learned about thoroughly, and understand the mechanism behind it. Something I always wanted to own, but somehow just didn't happen.
I bought a Zippo.
I know, I know. Some of you might be thinking, "What the fuck? A Zippo? That's it? You have been obsessing about a Zippo?" You might be thinking that I only have the right to brag if I bought an iPhone, or a Macbook, or an Ed Hardy original t-shirt, or a BMW. Doesn't matter to me. I don't desire those things. Never even think about thinking to own them. Except for the BMW. But that is a totally different thing. I obsess about Zippo, ever since I started smoking in 2003. I see it more than just a smoking paraphernalia. I see it as a collector's item. Something to be very proud of. Everything about it captivates me. Every markings, the sound it makes when the top is fling open, the flame it produces, the maintenance aspects, the shine of its finish, everything. I even watched videos on interesting ways to light the Zippo. I just love that thing. And I am very proud that I can finally own one.
Big deal, you say? Well, I don't really care what you think. All I care about, is that I finally own something I crave for, something I obsess about. I have satisfied my male obsession for now.
The feeling I get when I light my first cigarette using my own Zippo?
Simply exquisite, out of this world experience.
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